Sometimes you make amazing films. Sometimes you make 2012.This is Jack Burton in the Pork Chop Express, and I'm talkin' to whoever's listenin' out there.
Full disclosure: I love John Cusack. And I don't mean it in the way that I love puppies, or fat, lazy newborns, or bad Chinese food. I mean I respect him and his work. It's not easy making as many iconic 80s films as he did and coming out relatively unscathed (Neve Campbell aside). Also, I really like wearing my white tank top. It shows off my pecs and biceps particularly well.
Well, back to the topic at hand. I caught Hot Tub Time Machine with Hombre Lobo and my cousin a couple days ago. Did I go in expecting the world? Yes. Did it deliver? Yes. That's right, ladies and gentlemen. The world. And everything in it. Now, you might disagree with me. Might. But let's be real: what could this film possibly offer that would top the premise, the style, and the hijinks that the trailer offers? Nothing. Everything's laid out for you. You have to be absolutely incompetent not to figure out what this film is all about. And it hits every note.
So for the sake of the status quo: John Cusack plays John Cusack, a relatively nice guy who's fallen out of touch with his two best friends: the black dude from The Office, that bald guy that was on The Daily Show and a few episodes of the incredibly unappreciated Arrested Development. So along with Cusack's nephew, that fat kid who's boinking that super hot best friend chick (who looks exactly like porn star Jessica Jaymes) with whom he acted in Sex Drive, they revisit the ski resort paradise of their youth. Yes. It's a fucking skiing movie. I can only shake my head at the sheer brilliance of this. And I am being completely serious.
They arrive at the town to realize that it's gone through some seriously shitty times and end up in their suite's hot tub, drinking their brains out. As the trailers indicate, they end up back in time, reliving Winterfest '86, a weekend of debauchery and awesomeness. There are the must-haves for any 80s film: the douche bag ski instructors, commie hatred, a music/dance number, a concert by Poison, and legwarmers. Watching this film unfold felt like coming home to mom, only to find mom no longer there, but replaced with that hot best friend chick from Sex Drive.
So mix in some Back to the Future conflict, some Terminator logic, some seriously hilarious scenes from the bunch, and you have one of the finest comedies I've seen in years. It's irreverent, charming, and absolutely fun to sit through. Are there moments that don't hit? Of course. Every comedy has it. Does it kind of lack a heart (a la Forty Year Old Virgin)? Yes. Absolutely. But it's not here for heart. It's here to send up and pay homage to the great 80s films that we saw or were relegated to late night viewings on the USA network in the early 90s.
But what saves it then? Rob Corddry. He steals every single scene he's in, be they getting his ass kicked by douche bags or convincing John Cusack's nephew to participate in a threesome with him and a random hot chick. By the time you see the black dude from The Office curse out a nine-year old version of his wife over the phone, you're pretty much nodding to yourself and thinking, "Y'know, this is going in my collection."
Cost Breakdown:
21.50 for a ticket, a chili cheese dog, and a large soda.
Yes. Yes. And yes again. Go see this! I could have bought the blu-ray for the price. And I still have the chance. Till next time, Pork Chop Express is signing off.
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